Motion to Designate Father to make Educational
Decisions
This
was drafted by my attorney in response to Stacy taking the kids out of Pine
Trail Elementary and putting them in Holly Hill Elementary in the summer of 2004.
Kids had attended Pine Trail since the beginning of the year when they joined
me in Daytona.
Zach
was in an integrated class with 2nd to 4th graders and for the first time doing
well in school. The teacher to student ratio was 4 to 1 and each student
studied at their appropriate level for each subject. I could tell that Zach was
actually learning and gaining more patience and endurance when tackling school
work. He was more comfortable and confident when doing his homework and cared
to do a good job. He had always been a good natured kid who is always happy to
please and I could tell he thought well of his teachers and doing his best.
Mirrissa
was in first grade and her immaturity was definitely becoming obvious compared
to other students. Her teacher has slated her to go into the same class as Zach
next year for additional support and recommended counseling and tutoring for
her over the summer to help her along. The teacher recommended Mrs. Breter who
was named "teacher of the year" recently and specialized in teaching
math to young children. I was happy that
she will also be joining a good class and teachers were not going to let her
slip through the cracks.
Stacy
on the other hand was very unhappy that the kids contact address was not her
address. She went to the registrar and had their registered addresses changed.
The Registrar Ruth even told her that if she changed the address they won't be
able to come back to Pine Trail next year. Stacy said they need to go to HER
school district's school. Throughout this dispute that was her only reason. In
response to my argument that Pine Trail was a better school, Stacy replied that
all her neighbors' kids attend Holly Hill
Elementary and they are all "good people". Later I found out this was untrue. Zach told
me that his friend Dylan and his sister attended private school and never went
to Holly Hill Elementary.
At
the hearing, this motion was dismissed and Stacy was allowed to enroll the
children at "her" school. The primary reason given by the judge was
that he cannot independently designate the father to make any decisions when
the main paternity motion had not yet been heard and decided in court.
Additionally, the judge said that the children are "not going to Harvard
any time soon anyway" and it would make very little difference where they
went to elementary school. Yes that is
an exact quote of his words. It infuriates me that the judge could carelessly
throw around such statements to decide the fate of my children's education. How
would HE feel if HIS children had to attend the worst rated school in the
county when they actually had a CHOICE of a better school? I knew that the judge had raised his family
in the "Trails" subdivision located in heart of
Holly
Hill Elementary had been given a "C" by the State for the year 2004
and parents were receiving vouchers to attend a better school if they chose to
do so. It was clear that parents
enrolled their kids in that elementary school only because they had no choice.
At
Holly Hill Elementary, Zachary was consistently making C's for reading and D's
for Math. He had A's and B's for Art and PE. I don't know what possesses Stacy
to do these things but she told him that he had only "one B and rest were A's" on his report card and took him out to eat to
reward him of his good grades. Zach was shocked to find out that his mother had
lied to him and that he was actually doing poorly in school.
Mirrissa
was having constant problems in class unable to focus and complete any little
task by herself. Teachers recommended assessment by a professional for ADHD and
other disorders along with tutoring and sessions with the school counselor to
improve her social skills. Stacy declined all of this. Her teacher told me that she requires
constant supervision from one of the teacher aids or she would not get anything
done as well as distract other children. Although her reading skills were at
grade level, she rarely did any work at school and never turned in her
homework. Her math skills were only a little more than being able to count and
add some with her fingers. By the
beginning of 2005, the teachers had to admit that Mirrissa's problems are more
than they can handle in the classroom.
In
December of 2004, Stacy moved in with her new boyfriend of one month. His house
was located in
This
incident was one of the "final straws". I realized that no matter
what, as long as I was in the picture, Stacy will do everything and anything
just to do the opposite of what I wanted. No matter how bad for the kids and
inconvenient it would make things for her, she just didn't want me to "get
the upper hand". I came to the
conclusion, though reluctantly that it was "I" that was causing Stacy
to act like this. All of my efforts to improve life for the kids by trying to
be involved in their school, encouraging them participate in extracurricular
activities are actually making the kids life worse. Under Stacy's watch the
kids would get the minimum of everything. They wouldn't get all the opportunities
of a children growing up in a middle class household. But on the other hand,
they wouldn't be deprived of good things that happen in their lives either. If
I hadn't agreed with her about Indian Trails, she would just probably have let
them get themselves up in the morning to attend Indian Trails. It would be too
much trouble for Stacy to get them up at
